One thing I have never been very good at is letting go of the past. Not necessarily things that have been done to me by others, but more things that I have done myself. I am still hanging on to a relatively inconsequential mistake that I made when I was 13 that rears it’s ugly head every once and a while. So letting go of the big things is practically impossible.

But I have spent most of the past year destroyed, and I can’t move forward if I hold on to all of it. I have to find a way to put what happened away and not carry it with me throughout the years to come. It does me no good and just eats away at whatever progress I make. I can’t keep going through that cycle and heal.

I think this is honestly going to be the hardest part on my healing journey this year. And I know that it won’t happen overnight, unless I suddenly develop some form of amnesia to wipe it all away. But I want to heal more than I want to avoid dealing with it, so it’s time to deal with it.